2020-04-26 03-09-48 PDTMartin Owens <doctormo@geek-2.com>@windell.oskay i completely understand though. Peer moderation is an important tool.
2020-04-26 03-13-24 PDTMartin Owens <doctormo@geek-2.com>@Mc i agree, the responses where terrible.
2020-04-26 03-09-13 PDTMartin Owens <doctormo@geek-2.com>@c.rogers if you want to do mediation. I think that would be good.
2020-04-26 03-11-41 PDTMartin Owens <doctormo@geek-2.com>@c.rogers one thing you may need to contend with is getting appologies from everyone (if even willing to) and somehow get grey to not violet the coc when angry.
2020-04-26 03-14-52 PDTMartin Owens <doctormo@geek-2.com>So the only question is if its worth investing time
2020-04-26 03-08-32 PDTMartin Owens <doctormo@geek-2.com>@Mc you are invited too
2020-04-26 03-25-30 PDTMartin Owens <doctormo@geek-2.com>Teeth gritting os the hardest man!
2020-04-26 03-15-58 PDTMartin Owens <doctormo@geek-2.com>@Mc i dont understand.
2020-04-26 03-09-58 PDTMartin Owens <doctormo@geek-2.com>Meadiation
2020-04-26 03-19-54 PDTMc <marcjeanmougin@free.fr>(btw, my pm with xxcoder: ) 11:12 that's ok, no need to answer 11:13 didnt plan to say more lol
2020-04-26 03-12-37 PDTMc <marcjeanmougin@free.fr>it's ok to post once "Progress ??" on the bugtracker if you're not aware it can be rude, it's not ok to ignore and belittle people who tell you that it could be / is rude, and even worse to insult them in a sexist way
2020-04-26 03-15-27 PDTMc <marcjeanmougin@free.fr>XXcoder answered "good bye assholes" with a "please join in covid freedom protests", while I agree that it would have been better to not answer I don't think it as disproportionate
2020-04-26 03-09-20 PDTMc <marcjeanmougin@free.fr>+1
2020-04-26 03-17-52 PDTMc <marcjeanmougin@free.fr>"I will have to be even about it and get CoderXX to apologise too." -> one was a clear insult, the other was just a "please go away" (note that i'm not really neutral in this, you don't have to agree with me :p )
2020-04-26 03-10-25 PDTMc <marcjeanmougin@free.fr>you can do meditation too if you want to
2020-04-26 03-14-04 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>But yes. Clear violations. I don't really bring up the CoC
2020-04-26 03-11-36 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>moderation, mediation, meditation.
2020-04-26 03-34-41 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>That's basically the end of my monologue. :)
2020-04-26 03-41-43 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>I might for example, have a laugh about some bugs that I'm still wanting to have fixed.
2020-04-26 03-27-24 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>That's also why I don't want to ask for or demand appologies.
2020-04-26 03-13-30 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Yes, but many people don't think about being sexist when they are upset.
2020-04-26 03-40-58 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Then start relating. Showing how frustrations are shared by everyone int he group about the very same things they are frustrated about.
2020-04-26 03-36-17 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>(if they are a man, of course). :)
2020-04-26 03-27-55 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>I may suggest that after I see signs of remorse.
2020-04-26 03-42-50 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>But I'll relate it to my gripes, not theirs.
2020-04-26 03-23-27 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Some teeth gritting may be necessary, but a conversation on the side goes a long way.
2020-04-26 03-29-12 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>One of the deep issues with CoC is that people love a show, and it should never ever be made into one.
2020-04-26 03-46-30 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Anyway, that's my approach.
2020-04-26 03-18-02 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Apologies will follow naturally if I'm succesful in making greytomorrow feel like part of the group agian.
2020-04-26 03-19-33 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>People don't need to be told to go away. That's not what we're about.
2020-04-26 03-36-45 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Then I just wait.
2020-04-26 03-22-09 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Anything said to escalate (no matter how tempting or satisfying in the moment) is not what we should do.
2020-04-26 03-09-33 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>meditation? haha
2020-04-26 03-25-24 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>The best outcome is corrected behaviour. Can't do it while upset.
2020-04-26 03-13-36 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Or racist, or whatever.
2020-04-26 03-17-06 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>I'm tempted not to ask for appologies.
2020-04-26 03-28-21 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>As a cure for that "man, I hope we can all be friends again" sour stomach feeling.
2020-04-26 03-19-43 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Besides, that never works. lol
2020-04-26 03-11-04 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Ah there, yes.
2020-04-26 03-19-58 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Or at least not in the way we want it to.
2020-04-26 03-34-54 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>concerns?
2020-04-26 03-43-34 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>I find that the basic fundamental problems are shared by all of us.
2020-04-26 03-14-42 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>It's not usually necessary if you can relate to people, show them they are supported, make them feel like part of the community again, better behaviour follows.
2020-04-26 03-10-21 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Man, I need my glasses hold on.
2020-04-26 03-18-33 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>"please go away and potentially die" more like it.
2020-04-26 03-12-34 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>[ ](https://chat.inkscape.org/channel/private_coc?msg=fbe7f9db-8bdc-4b05-be77-2e1af46ea2c0) @doctormo Yes, though in doing so, I will have to be even about it and get CoderXX to apologise too. ()
2020-04-26 03-42-33 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>And then speak up about how hard everyone works to fix things.
2020-04-26 03-16-13 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>the CoC does not allow for proportional escalation.
2020-04-26 03-15-50 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>It's not about "proportionality".
2020-04-26 03-47-50 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>It's not at all easy, but it's the best way I've found to pull folks back and make them feel like part of the community.
2020-04-26 03-20-14 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Yea, it's good to stop. lol
2020-04-26 03-30-18 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Basically, I don't want anyone to feel hard done by. That's a particularly long lasting feeling, and saps motivation to do things together.
2020-04-26 03-34-50 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Any questions? ;)
2020-04-26 03-15-26 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Well, it's probably worth a shot. Esp if the alternative is banning. ;P
2020-04-26 03-09-46 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Am I too worked up to handle this? ;)
2020-04-26 03-39-13 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Rant, rave, get it all out.
2020-04-26 03-10-10 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Oh, mediation.
2020-04-26 03-29-33 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>This is why CoC is a dirty word to a lot of people.
2020-04-26 03-36-02 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>This is how I always start moderation: "Hey man, you okay?"
2020-04-26 03-25-31 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>It's simply not possible.
2020-04-26 03-48-41 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>CoderXX seems okay, but I can reach out to them too if anyone thinks they are upset still.
2020-04-26 03-11-09 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>Mediation.
2020-04-26 03-44-52 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>So addressing those in terms of how our tight knit community responds to those problems can be motivating and educating all at the same time.
2020-04-26 03-21-17 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>We want people to correct bad behaviour. Re-establishment of a connection must be made first.
2020-04-26 03-39-06 PDTC.Rogers <cajhne@gmail.com>If they are still interested in talking it out, they will. I will let them say whatever they want.
2020-04-26 03-09-12 PDTWindell Oskay <windell@evilmadscientist.com>Hi -- Sorry for potentially overstepping my bounds.
2020-05-19 11-19-39 PDTMartin Owens <doctormo@geek-2.com>Private Group (room_changed_privacy)
2020-05-19 11-18-54 PDTMartin Owens <doctormo@geek-2.com>User windell.oskay removed by doctormo.
2020-04-26 03-08-33 PDTMc <marcjeanmougin@free.fr>Has joined the channel.